i have mischievous friends

homecoming court


o dear

baahhhh

not looking forward to the drive alone again. it's just boring - and I've spent more time in the car this week than I have outside. driving me just a wee bit crazy.

But chicago means friends, friends that I've been apart from for way too long.
It doesn't matter how much I loved this summer and the people I met. there is just something about being with someone that knows you a little better, a little deeper - someone you have a past with. just something about it that's soothing.

motivation = non-existent

I am officially capitalizing on senioritis.

I really do love learning, and taking awesome classes is a great way to do that...

but I'm tired.

All I want to do is play games, drink long-islands, read what I want, go on adventures, etc. etc. etc.

recovery

I am in recovery - and recovery is beautiful :)

recovery consists of:

baseball games,
sushi,
lots of sushi,
a cute little dog named lucy,
wine & cigars,
a cowgirl hat,
family & friends,
$30 worth of wendell berry and aristotle,
hiking all day & sleeping all night,

and there's still more to come

awful awful night.

claiming peace

so, I took my 'day of silence', which wasn't necessarily that silent.
I booked a room at the cenacle in lincoln park for a day, read a book that was on the table when I got there, met the sweet sister rose, ate a fantastic lunch, and came to a decision.

I'm going to have a calm and trusting heart.

This is the first time that I've felt the peace of God and not been afraid to lose it. I'm not just being randomly blessed with peace, I'm claiming the peace that is always and has always been.

I don't feel like this has been a huge transformation in my life, or a huge stepping stone. It probably is, but it all feels very subtle and natural.

It seems so simple. claiming peace. I WILL have a calm and trusting heart.

desperate

I'm desperate for a day away - away from everything.

I've been looking forward to the full-day silent retreat all semester. It was going to be this Saturday. Got an email this morning saying it was cancelled because only 2 people signed up.

Frankly, I wanted to cry. But I had no energy to - let's just say today was a busy day. It's been a busy semester, and the next few weeks are going to be even worse. I had been setting aside this day and counting on it, and then suddenly that all vanished.

Well, I'm still going to take my day of silence - and perhaps going alone will make it even better. but the shake up made me realize how desperate I've been for this day.

I keep wanting to say that I can't wait for the semester to be over... but really I fear coming upon the next week and I'm too scared to dream of the time after... I'm not going to let his happen next year. This is my last semester of being over-committed.

i hope